Because I Just Might Crush You Down

There, I am standing right there.
Can you see me? Just right there.
Maybe not, the smoke is hiding me.
It’s thick, black and suffocating; engulfs me.
But you won’t be able to feel that, why would you?
You don’t even care, how could you?

But let me tell you, I’m reaching my limit.
I probably just might give up… Shall I?
No no, I won’t do that, it’s not worth it.
Because the joy of crushing everything else is,
Overwhelming.
So is this darkness,
Don’t know where it comes from.
It’s frustrating, agonizing, painful.
But don’t worry about me, I’ll sail through,
With or without your help.

It’s funny, the more I try to escape,
The thicker the smoke gets: such is life.
Breathless, panting,
Almost dying,
I’ve finally fallen on my knees.
The colours of my soul have long gone.
Instead the smoke is filling my lungs.
But no, I have to get back up, will you lend me your hand?

But wait, I don’t need your hand, not yours!
Not yours, when there are countless others waiting in line.
Because I think, somewhere in the past,
I gave them mine too.

The mother, who I would gladly give my head for,
The angels who I call friends,
That girl from school who felt lighter talking to me- I was just being myself.
And that other friend- I can’t quite remember.
They’re all there,
Each with their hand and heart to give.
So, why yours? Forget it, I never asked for it, I’m sorry.

But you know what? I’m done.
I’m done being so sad,
And having zero motivation to live.
I’m going to bring in some change, somehow.
Maybe this mindset is all the change I need.
Look into my heart… Did you find it?
Look closely… No? In there lies my dignity.
In there lies my essence.
In there lies me.
And I will let them grow.
So thank you, for whatever.
But you do me a favour.
And never stand in my way.
Because
I just might crush you down.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hello! This was one of my first shots at poetry, and I know it’s quite mediocre but it was fun to give it a try. Poems come out of me usually when I’m so overwhelmed by an emotion. So yes, I meant every single word in there. It is quite straightforward, but why don’t you guys share your interpretation down in the comments? I’d love to read them, and will tell you how close you are. 🙂

Until next time,